An Interview with an Undertaker: Dealing with Death

Hungry Ghost Festival just ended, and all the talk of Death and afterlife is somewhat still in the air. What more a time such as this to talk about death and the afterlife?

Death is something that people fear because they do not know what happens after a person dies. Is it the end all of life? People around me would know that not too long ago, my grandma passed away. The idea of death is still fresh in my memory. Then just a months, my archery teammate's grandma passed away too. Both are not saved. Neither is my friend himself. Uncannily, recently someone newly close to my heart has to do a project on the topic of unsung heros of this funeral trade and I decided to tag along to find out more behind the scenes and how these people view death and mourning.

Many things happened before she passed away that made family ties estranged, so when she passed away, I was left hanging with a lot of personal issues. Furthermore, my grandma is not saved, which makes things more heartbreaking for me, as I have the hope of heaven that she did not have, and I will never see her again. Hence, I found that though I'm more or less moving on in life and happily serving the Lord, my heart still wants to reconcile certain things, and I realised that I may not be the only one facing such an issue within my circle of friends. I have a lot of ambivalent feelings in my heart and I know that I am and will not be in the only one. So I hope this in the process of interviewing, collecting information and writing the article, I can find some solace and answers that I can share with everyone in the same plight.

Background of the undertaker:
The undertaker is a strong Christian whose family members are also Christians. He and his family often helps out in the church as much as he can. Being in this line for so long, even as much as to be a big boss, he certainly has contemplated on life and death, and has placed his faith and trust in God for the salvation of his family and himself. In my face to face chat with him to request for an email interview, the strong idea that I got was that death is a natural process and it is by no means a glorious thing to be profiting from the deaths of others, but he certainly does this as a personal mission to do what others dare not do and providing funeral services so that the families of the deceased can mourn properly.


I realised that because of the fact that he enthusiastically replied my questions seriously, his answers were  in no way deficient of content nor depth. Cutting out and editing on any words were difficult as it will not do him justice, so I will split up the interview into segments and do this posts in a 4 part series as follows:
1. Dealing with Death (This post)
2. Definition of Death
3. Destination after Death
4. Distortion of Life from Death

Without further ado, I bring you the first of the 4 part series of An Interview with an Undertaker.

Dealing with Death

Question: How have your religion and job influenced the way you view death?

I am a Christian. I believe what the Bible tells me. It says that when I believe in Jesus and accept Him as my Lord and Saviour, I will have eternal life when I die. As such, I do not fear death because when I die I go to Heaven. Why would I be fearful to go to Heaven? My job as a funeral director keeps me constantly reminded that death is so real. Everyday people die, people cry over them, and I hear stories of many things that were planned but not done because death cuts short his time to do so. This reality makes me sensitive to others, to treat them with love. To tell my family I love them and to do things that make people happy, things that count. Because I see death every day, it makes me treasure life the more, life of others and my own. I think it might be more appropriate if you asked me how I view life because of death. Yes, my life, how I live it and what I make it to be is my gift back to God and I hope He will not be disappointed investing in me. 

Join me next week as I talk about the Definition of Death and what it means to him and most probably to me too.

Self Versus God: Are our hearts really on God?

I just had a revelation, if not, reminder in a form of a big sized reasoning that I cannot ignore.

A commonly asked question is "Prove to me that God exist". My question to them is "You sure u wanna listen to my explanation? It's not going to be short like a snap nor is it going to be pleasing to ur ears." Humans have a finite form and therefore have finite mind and heart. How can we squeeze a infinite God that lived before time, and created time within time and our finite minds that is smaller than time? God does not need to prove his existence to us if we refuse to accept that he is bigger than us.

And to ask God to show his miracles like healing and uncommon signs to prove his glory and power or even satisfy our desire to be reaffirmed that he is real or just for the feel high is like asking a trained poodle to do stunts. God is no trained poodle, he will do miracles and heal as he pleases to and he will show his glory and power in his way and we must acknowledge it. In fact he has already shown his glory and power to us, in our being itself and in his son Jesus, the most innocent man who died the most horrifically humiliating and painful death for the sake of God's will which is to provide a way for our salvation through Jesus' death and resurrection.

This will indeed be mind boogling to people who have choosen from the start to ask for prove just for the sake of an intellectual debate and self-gratification that God doesn't exist. If we have our hearts full of ourselves, how can we have the space to let God in, let alone the people around us?

When we ask for his glory to be shown on earth? Is it for prove to the world that God is almighty or is it to prove to people that we are believing in the right thing and be proud(or even boostful about it)? When we ask for healing of people in general, is it for ourselves to get better or is it a cheap way to show people what God can do so that they can choose God?

Are our hearts really on God?

What I replied when a church leader asked me on fb msgs why I left church.

"I guess the most bugging thing is the constant demands for spiritual gifts without the understanding of who God is. He is a God who loves to shower his children with gifts yet we may not think of it as gifts and constantly push for what we want. God has all right to refuse our request because he knows what is suitable for us though we constantly "seek and ask" from God. The lack of understanding of who God is makes us selfish and treat God as an ATM.

People often forget that the man with the leprosy got healed for that fact that miracles were needed to show God's power over the fallen world. Furthermore we must not forget to be like the man and first approach God with a humble heart "Lord if you may, heal me." This shows that the man understands God's sovereignty so much that he recognise that God may or may not heal him because he is a sinner. Though many say that now we are no longer called sinners but victors in Christ, we must bear in mind that we still cannot be brazen in our request in front of the almighty God or we might end up taking him for granted.

Having stated my view, I feel that this lack of understanding leads the the issue of people unknowingly and/or brazenly treating God like an ATM or sorts. When people do not get what they prayed for, it is often brushed off as having little faith. The result is people becoming disillusioned and fall into becoming nominal Christians.

Even before I became a leader, I have tried to address this issue, but nothing seems to get across. Besides, I feel like over the years I have not been edified because I thought that I have been faithless in my request. Half maybe true, but the other half is because I realised that I did not see God for who he is and not what he can do for us. Also, my position as a leader made it worst cause I was more aware that I couldn't cause people to be "slain by the spirit" even though I prayed for them and I feel bad because they didn't get the spiritual gift they wanted such as "tongues" or something else. But I know that I have touched the lives of others through normal prayer because by God's grace, 1 or 2 youths to be leaders because they told me that they felt convicted by the spirit to be leaders after I "prophesied" over them being leaders without me realising it. & though I have not directly been told so, it is implied that I lack the faith when I ask for spiritual gifts. Having said that, I am pointing out the amount of flourish and emphasis the church put into this gifts that physically manifest themselves and have became short sighted for quick results that they many fail to recognise that God is in the driver's seat and not us. Again, this leads back to people becoming disillusioned with God or brazen in front of God.

My argument may be weak and you may or may not agree with me but I feel that since I would be a rebel in church and would confuse the minds of the young ones if I continue to serve as a leader, I should quit. Also, as I did not feel fed in PLMC and get the necessary edification and/or exhortation, but get it from another church, I should move to pastures that are able to feed me and help me to grow healthly. I have talked to various leaders from church and from my NIE Bible study group and have prayed for years to come to this decision. Regardless, my family church will still be PLMC and I will still pray for the people as I do with other people.

Sorry for this long reply, but this is my long story in a capsule form. HAHA... Hope it didn't make you stunned and satisfy your curiosity."